My brother has pretty much confirmed that Jack William Yarnall (top photo) is my biological father. And Ralph Edward Nase (below) is not. He traced it through two different sites. It is possible that Jack was a one-night stand although knowing my mother, I doubt it. But I am doubtful it was much more than that because he was only 19 on the night in question. My mother was 24. There are so many strange things about all of this but this is one of them.
In many of the stories I have written there is a girl looking for her father. SHOT IN DETROIT and HOME INVASION in particular) I never had any way of knowing this was my circumstance when I wrote those stories. Actually the idea of a missing father came from my best friend at age 12-14, a girl who haunted library phone directory rooms trying to find her Dad. So the thing that haunted my friend was also my situation. Did I know this on some level? I doubt it.
Do we all have a mystery? One we may not even ever know.
11 comments:
The whole DNA testing and Ancestry industries are changing everything. Tracing biological parents and other family members, once almost impossible endeavors, now can be achieved through new technology.
I’m against all such inquiries. Biology (nature) means less than day to day experience (nurture) in my case. I was adopted, know about my mother but not my father (biological), and have no interest in uncovering the past. The present and future are sufficient challenges to this old man. But, I wish you well in your quest. I do not mean to rain on your parade. Just offering a meandering reaction.
I'm guessing you wish you'd never known about any of this, and that your brother had left well enough alone. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's how I'd feel.
Every time I see one of those ancestry,com ads (which is pretty much every day), I get annoyed at their presentation of it all as one big fun quest to discover that you're really Scottish rather than German (or whatever). Obviously there is plenty of money to be made or you wouldn't be seeing the ads. While in certain cases I can understand it, I wouldn't do it myself. Granted, I know who I am every time I look in the mirror and see my father and grandfather, but this can clearly cause a lot of anguish. People do not realize what a can of worms they might be opening.
Sometimes looking at ancestry can be a case of 'be careful what you wish for...'
Well, I had a tiny doubt about my father so my brother said why not satisfy yourself. He had no idea of what would come and his intentions were good.
I do regret it. And I don't plan to land in the Yarnall's family's lap because what good could it possibly do. The thing that is so hard to live with is knowing my mother kept her secret for 85 years and that must have been an awful thing.
Some questions have arisen just looking back at old documents and news clippings. I was given to understand my murdered uncle was a police officer when he was killed (in a bar), though his newspaper coverage suggests he was driving a truck at the time (he might've been moonlighting...his brother was a lifelong trucker).
And my grandfather, I was given to understand, was born in Milan...but his entrance papers for emigration list his birthplace as Rome. Not that the clerks gave much of a damn ca. 1905. "Italy? Rome."
And sorry that things remain a bit unsettling...she had that secret for your lives together...do you think it felt less pressing, less disturbing with time? Hope so. Hope it will be less troubling for you in time, too.
Wow. People are capable of such secrets.
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